Wednesday, May 22, 2013


Dear Body,

I cannot remember the last time that I did anything for you whole-heartedly.

I’ve done nothing but mistreat you and abuse you in every way, for decades. I’m not only sorry but truly and utterly ashamed of how I’ve treated you all this time. I’ve disrespected you in every way and allowed others to do the same. I’ve ridiculed and blamed you for not allowing me to reach my goal, potential or status. As if it was your fault that I did not fuel you properly, so that you could perform at your best. All I’ve done is neglect you in every way. Feeding you the wrong foods, keeping you inactive and not loving you.

In return, you have done nothing but allowed me the chance to move and carry on every day. No matter how sick you’ve been or how tired I’ve made you. You have not failed me. You allow my heart to beat each day and give me room to breathe. Anyone/Anything else would have abandoned me a long time ago but you, you stay. You believe in me when I don’t. You care for me when my spirit cannot. Somehow you know that my will is strong and that someday…someday I will raise you up. Somehow you know that together we can do anything.

I’m deeply sorry that it’s taken me so long to come around and feel the damage that I’ve been single-handedly manifesting upon you all these years. I’m disgusted at my behaviour and ask, no beg you, for your forgiveness.

I want to thank you for being so kind, so loving and so very patient with me. For taking it slow and allowing me to understand and truly hear what it is you really need from me. For understanding that this journey of ours is my most difficult one. Thank you most for always reaching out to me, whenever I fall off the wagon and succumb to my old ways. Your love and support is always unconditional and I know it doesn’t have to be so. I have seen many bodies give up on others and am beyond grateful that you see something in me, in us, to carry on and stay right by my side – every step of the way. Lord knows I don’t deserve you, but I’m glad he believes I’m worth it.

I don’t have all the answers. I am not always strong. There will be days when the addict in me will surface and reign true, allowing my spirit to fall. These are what I call “the empty days”, when I feel helpless, worthless and cannot find meaning in anything. But, it’s during those days that I will need you to love me most. It is then that I will need you to work with my mind and spirit to help me back up, so that I can deliver myself from all the unnecessary evils. I’m not saying that I will never fail you again because I will. I’m human after all and must allow for such things. If I don’t, I will only cause myself more destruction and disillusion, and I think I’ve done enough of that already. All I beg of you is patience. That you continue to work with me and keep strong.

I promise that better days are ahead and someday, I will make you shine again. This, I vow.

To all women everywhere:

It’s time that we stop abusing our bodies and self-worth before it’s too late. We need to put an end to the “society talk” and status quos and truly see what we are really doing to our bodies because of it.

I had to learn the hard way and today, I live and fight with 2 eating disorders. It’s been the hardest struggle of my life to date. One that I pray to overcome. I wasn’t strong enough to understand that nothing/no one could ever love my body better than I could. That society should never dictate what anyone’s worth is. But, I didn’t and because of it, I live with the consequences of my decisions every day.

Today, I thankfully have an incredible team of people behind me and I am on the road to recovery.  *** To my medical team of professionals, my Therapists, Group clinic team, my family and friends:  Thank-you so much for working so hard every day to show me the way.  I would not be alive today if it wasn't for all your "tough love", strength and support.  I love you all. ****

It has taken me a year to come to terms with all the emotions and fear that this illness has brought. Afraid of admitting all that I am going through for fear that no one would understand. Afraid of being ridiculed and judged. But it’s time. I’m realizing that by hiding I’m missing out on helping others going through the same thing.

If you or anyone you know/love is suffering from an eating disorder or eating addiction, there is help out there. All you have to do is ask. Don’t be afraid or pretend it’s not happening, like I did. Don’t wait until it’s too late to love yourself. Trust me, there is no greater glory than “self-love” and no greater fulfillment than being healthy…. at any weight!

I invite you all to join me in the pledge to our bodies below:

Much love & respect:  Gia

Today I pledge to love my body.

I pledge to refrain from saying derogatory things about my weight, shape, or appearance. If I talk about my body, it will be to tell the world how absolutely fabulous it is.

I pledge to hold others accountable to respecting my body in all its shapely glory. I will not allow others to create the definitions of what is right for my body. I will make those decisions and stand firm by them.

I pledge to honour the signals that my body sends me. I will sleep when I’m tired, eat when I’m hungry, and drink when I’m thirsty. I will play when my body needs movement and slow down when it needs rest. I will listen closely.

I pledge to treat my body well, just for being amazing. I will do things that give my body pleasure in all forms, as long as those things don’t hurt me.

I pledge to stand up for the right of all bodies to be treated with respect. I will defend others whom I hear bullied and will take action when society tries to tell us what the “right” body is.

I pledge to move my body in ways that give me joy and energy. I will bend and twist and stretch and jump, but I will not devote hours of my life to activity that brings my body pain, tension, or stress.

I pledge to be honest with myself about my body and it’s needs and desires. I will not hide behind lies that I am not good enough, tall enough, attractive enough, thin enough, or just enough.

I pledge to teach others to love their bodies as well, by modeling a positive attitude toward my body and showing others that acceptance is possible. I will inspire in others what I wished someone inspired in me.

~ Author of the Pledge is Unknown ~


  1. Well Done! You know anyone can call themselves a Writer and just write about anything but it takes a true talent to put their own real life experiences and struggles out there and connect with readers. I’m so proud of you Mami. You took a really difficult experience and made it public so that someone else going through a similar experience could somehow relate to it and reach out. WOW! That’s all I gotta say. You are divinely gifted Gia. I told you that when I first met you and I say it again. You were meant for greatness. Thank God you write. You are always so real and so emotional. It’s amazing. I’m sure this was one of the hardest things you had to put down on paper but you did it. Be very proud of yourself. You will get through this. I’m always here for you too.

  2. A very touching blog post, Gia. I’m sure I speak for most of your followers when I say that we were all wondering and concerned with what you were going through. Now that it’s out in the open I think it will give you much peace.
    My thoughts and prayers are with you. You can do this. Fight and never give up on yourself!!

    Audrey Sanders
    Chicago, Illinois

  3. Ciao Bella Gia,

    Questa scritura era molto bella. Propio cingeramente. Ti volgio dirti che tu sai una bellisima donna e devi vivere per te stessa, non per qualcun' altro. Mi dispiace molto. Spero che Dio ti fa forte.

    Tanti Baci di Venezia Carina Mia

    Maria Angela Faustino
    Venezia, Italia


    Get well, Bella!


  5. you are one of the greatest authors of our time.

  6. I really enjoyed reading this post Gia. I'm sorry to hear all it is that you are going through but, it will definitely make you a stronger person and woman. Never give up on yourself and most importantly to your readers and fans: NEVER stop writing.


  7. I agree with the person two above. Gia, you are one of the greatest Writers I have ever had the pleasure of falling upon. You blog means more than you could ever know.


  8. Thank you for writing this piece and sharing your struggle with your public. I am a Mother of 4 girls and I worry so much about their well-being - especially their body image.

    My youngest is 12 and my eldest is 23 and they always say things like: "I wish I could look like her. How can I get that body?" It really scares me.

    Worried Mom & Woman

  9. WOW!!! Great blog!!

  10. Hi Gia,

    Thank you for having the bravery and courage to share your struggle and journey with us. Please know that I am in your corner, and love you lots!
    This blog really hits home...again thank you.


  11. You are beautiful! I don't know you, nor have I ever laid eyes on you, but I know that you are. How? Because your words are and only someone with a beautiful mind, heart, soul and face can come up with such poetry. Even when you are confessing something, you make it sound so magical. So poetic.

    You should be very proud of all you are and all you do, Gia. It takes A LOT of courage to be a Human Being, especially in today's society. But we fight and go on fighting. That's all we can do.

    Be strong and live stong little girl.

    All the best!

    John and Pamela Stanten
    Road Island, USA

  12. Congrats Gia!
    I know very well how hard this is for you. You are on a great road to recovery. I've seen your potential and know you have it in you to do this. You have now connected with so many more individuals out there. So proud of you. Luving you so much!

  13. Well said Gia! I applaud you. Keep working at it and above all love yourself. If anyone judges you or ridicules you ignore them, they probably have less self esteem than you and they seldom look in the mirror inside.