Saturday, August 21, 2010


As the month of August soon comes to a close, I am automatically reminded that September is fast approaching.  What's more, the anniversary of 9/ 11 will be here once again.

The other day I stumbled across, what I believe was one of the best movies that I have seen in my lifetime.  One that I believe everyone should watch at some point in their lives.  In a manner of speaking it was truly: "Life Altering"

The movie had many different flavours to it, but all intertwining around the concept of racism. It was a tale depicting what 9/ 11 did, not only to the people of the United States of America, but to people on a general level.  The twist was that it allowed you to see the other side of the spectrum.  What the Muslim people went through all over the world because of this butchery on American soil.

The sad part about the entire thing was how real it was.  This was no fictional story, no made up tale for the public's amusement or entertainment.  It was "real life".  What we go through each day.  It truly made me feel such sadness from deep within.  After viewing it I was utterly disgusted with the human race (on a general level).  Mainly because of how much racism is still very much a part of our everyday life.

It boggles my mind how incredibly close minded we, as human beings are.  How we are so quick to judge, ridicule and persecute an entire culture of people for actions that a small few felt in their belief was right at a given moment.  Do we, as people, not take anything away from our history?  Have we not learned how asinine it is to pass judgement on others because of: race, colour, belief, sex and creed?  I suppose in my mind I truly believed we were better than this kind of thought process.  That we were smarter than that.  More loving than that.  Kinder, richer than that way of living.  My mistake. My sad, sad mistake.

I for one say loud and proud that I love all people and things equally, because it's God's will. I have always believed in sharing this planet with everyone - no matter how difficult it can get at times.  I am truly thankful and blessed for my heart, my way of free thinking and my spirit.  For it is how my Allah created me and how I wish to return to him someday.  Free of hate, free of judgement and full of love.

After all, if he does not judge, how dare I judge?  If he shows forgiveness, mercy and love for all-how dare I not?

Watch it in your lifetime.  I truly believe it will move you beyond words:
MY NAME IS KHAN :  Starring:  Shahrukh Khan and Kajol


Monday, August 16, 2010

Gambling With Moral

Last week our dearly beloved Government announced that they have authorized regulated online gambling to begin in 2012. Soon any one of us will be able to gamble until our hearts content - all in the privacy of our own home. On the surface, a splendid idea concocted by our Government officials, to do it's part in taking care of this country's growing deficit problems. Arguably, they are running out of options for new revenue sources so this seemed like the best cure for our current disease. Apparently the province forecasts that they can expect an additional $100 million a year in the first five years its online betting is up and running. Fantastic on a business level, yes, but we are merely selling our souls to the devil for the ol' mighty dollar yet again.

My thoughts are simple: I want to know why our Government has abandoned us morally? Why? Why are we, as citizens continuously paying for the sins of our Government on so many different levels? Not only has McGuinty's Government abandoned any moral purpose they have to us, but they have gambled away our souls solely for the pursuit of money.

It will help get us as a country on a financial level -great. Yet what about the other glorious things it brings with it? The debit it will cause household to household. The fire it will ignite in both new and current addicts. The disorientation and emotional isolation it will create in people young and old. How do those things better our society? Instead of a nation coming together we are one falling apart, bit by bit, each and every day. Gambling is such a corrosive addiction and it devastates lives daily. Why can the Government not see that? Why can they not look beyond the financial aspect of things and see that they are simply providing addicts with another tool to destroy their lives with?

Now I am well aware that as human beings we must take our destiny’s in our own hands and be responsible with all mechanisms in our daily lives, but we are all susceptible to addictions. There are many out there but society fails to acknowledge the fact that they truly play a significant role in setting them up for us. Yes, we currently have other forms of gambling out there now: Race tracks, casinos, sport prolines and lotteries; but statistics and research shows that online gambling addictions is 3 to 4 times higher than any other form of gambling. Let's face it, the flesh is weak my friends, so why tempt fate? Why are we allowing the carrot of destruction and addiction to be dangled in our faces by a Government who truly could care less about it's people? A Government who demands our votes, money and support with promises of democracy and a positive way of life. Yet, all we get in return is growing poverty and anti-socialism.

We hear more and more that we are a "lazy nation" The number of people living with things such as: obesity, behaviour issues, lack of social skills and inactivity are astounding. Our healthcare system is in dire need of things to change in these areas and yet here we are adding fuel to these fires with online gambling. The continuous tax dollars spent on "cries of help" messages by our Government in the local media to get active and to make sure our kids are active as well. Such hypocrisy I tell you! Now we have to sit back and allow this to happen.

It astounds me, truly. I mean what business do you know of that continuously promises certain goods and services delivered, receives money on a continual basis - only loose it all, every time. Then, makes you (the consumer) pay repeatedly for it's lack of financial "know-how"? It's ridiculous! The only "business" I know of that is allowed to operate this way is in fact "THE GOVERNMENT" Oh, and make no mistake about it folks, it is a business!!!!

I for one am sick of it... all of it!

Thursday, August 12, 2010


It seems as though everything we do within a society is governed by rules of some sort. Whether they are imposed by a government party, an income source or our own families we, as individuals, must abide by them in order to survive within these types of environments.

Now in everyday life we also make demands upon ourselves in the same kind of sense. They may not be “laws” or “enforceable rules” by an outside party per say, but nevertheless they govern us by our own social and moral standards. These etiquettes, as they are sometimes referred to, can differ from person to person.

Etiquettes can be found virtually anywhere you look. There are dining etiquettes, attire etiquettes and yes even dating etiquettes. Although, many individuals if asked, would tell you that they may not be as well versed in the “dating rules” as they would be say with dining and fashion.

Now let’s stop and think about this for a second, shall we. What would some of these “rules” or etiquettes be when it comes to dating? Are they practiced and held in high regard? Do they differ between genders and situations? Could you name them if asked? Well according to men and women in today’s society they can be absolute deal breakers when it comes to dating or finding the “right mate” for you.

So let us sample of few of these so-called etiquettes for conversational purposes. One of the most talked about etiquette I have found that is in constant discussion today would have to be the way individuals are meeting. Some still hold true to the good old fashioned ways of meeting their potential dates: bars and social parties, while others have found a new way of breaking the ice: internet and speed dating arenas. Some individuals find it “socially unacceptable” to try the newer ways available to find a mate while others think it’s more convenient. Either way there are pros and cons to both methods, as there are to most things in life in general. With respect to the bar scene, many say the same things. You will never find your true soul mate or at least someone you can become potentially serious with in a Bar. The Bar or “the meat market” as it is widely referred to these days, is a place you go to when you are in need of a quick fix or the aka “one night stand”. And whether this is true or not 5 out of 10 people would gladly take their chances in this type of environment verses speed dating a bunch of strangers you barley know have seen, or exchanged two e-mails with. Now the pro to online dating is that the rate of success nowadays proves to be much higher of a possible long term commitment with those individuals who have found their mate this way, than those who meet in a bar or club social scene. The sad part of it all is that the statistics would in all probability be even higher still, if more people would freely admit to having met one another this way; rather than being too embarrassed to divulge such information to friends and family. My view here is simply this: It is hard enough to find someone you love in this world, much less one who is truly compatible in all aspects or areas of your life as it is – so why on earth downplay how one’s soul mate has come to find it’s other half? Does it truly matter? The answer is no! At least it is for me. But then again, I am not really one to be a social show dog or follow in the status quo lines of society either.

The Etiquettes to follow seem to fall into the “Venus verses mars” syndrome. Is one influence more dominant over the other? Let’s find out!

High on the dating scene list would have to be this: When going out on your first date who should pay, the male or female? As a result of some survey studies, most men would agree that on the first initial date, the gentlemanly thing to do is to pay, while others are fine with going “Dutch” (parties putting in equal shares). Now although opinions differed slightly on etiquette of the first or second date, all men agreed that for the dates to follow the lady should at least make an attempt to grab for their wallets to illustrate a “gesture of payment” in some manner or regard. This portrays a level of respect to their male counterparts that they are not just here, in their company, for a free meal. If the gesture on the lady’s part is not made, well then there is little or no hope for a next date. Now the ladies are all over the raider on this one. Some would agree with the men 100% while others would disagree in the same ideal percentage. I think it all stems down to a matter of respect and morals personally, but there is no true written rule in regards to this etiquette. I think generally it should be about what makes each individual comfortable as apposed to what the woman does verses the man. It’s more than that. Women have come such a long way in realms of equality and individualism of rights and yet when it comes to dating many of them revert back to old day mentalities and idealistics.

Now let’s back up for a second and visit etiquettes that date further back than the “first date”. How do people feel about “the first phone call”? Who should approach whom regarding a date? Once again surveys illustrated different answers with relation to gender. Some men would love a woman to take charge, pick up a the phone and make a date with them, while others would rather keep things old fashioned and make the first move themselves. Others went on to state that they find that women who approach men in bars are too pushy and come across as easy and desperate.

When it comes to dating etiquette one has to wonder, are these really valid rules of thumb to follow or is it all a bunch of sexism at it’s finest. I mean think about it for a moment. Does it not sound crazy? There are so many rules to follow to find someone to love. The silly thing is that we are all playing the same game but there are different rules for each player trying to cross the finish line. Men have a set and well the women seem to have their own. At this rate, how can anybody win? Have you ever played a game, any game where someone said, “ok ladies here is your rule book and fellas, here is yours” Would you not look at the score keeper and think “is this person crazy?” Or perhaps we are looking at it all wrong. How can anyone win a game if they don’t know how to play? Or worse, how can you possibly ever think of attaining the prize of the game when you keep hearing or having to study changes to the rulebook every other minute? The answer? Simple, don’t play the game. If it truly were a game complete with rules to follow it should only be: To (1) Always be kind and treat others with the same dignity and respect that you demand for yourself at all times. (2) To always be yourself because no matter what, because let’s face it, no one likes a phony.

Most of you are reading this thinking “what the hell!! What does she mean, don’t play the game? Don’t date? Is that what she’s saying?” No, that is not it at all. Date as you will just do not make it a game. It’s not a game, and the minute one treats it like one, all the rules in the world will not matter or help you at all because you’ve already lost. The biggest mistake that anyone could ever make is to treat dating, and people for that matter, as a game. We as individuals are all unique and marvelous creatures. We are all different in our own way. We look at life differently, we appreciate things differently, we laugh and enjoy certain things in their own ways and most importantly we seek, and love differently too. What we must all try to understand is simply this: make your own rules to your own life. Do what feels right for you. What may work for someone else will not always necessarily work for you. Just be yourself and get out there and have a blast. The most important thing to remember is that no matter what you do you may not always find love behind every dating door. Sometimes it doesn’t matter whether or not you pay for one date or all the dates. Sometimes it won’t make a difference if you call the individual the same night they gave you their number or use the “3 day rule” and wait not to seem too desperate. Sometimes it really doesn’t matter if you brought the lady a flower on your first date…or were too nervous to think of it at all. Some day, despite all you do or don’t do, you will find the one you seek because it is your time. It’s that simple. All the rules in the world will not matter, but rather the one important thing will be evident. That no matter how crazy the dating travels were it was worth the ride and you are truly a better, richer individual for having gone along with the adventure.

Wednesday, August 11, 2010

My Essence

I am who I am... a simple woman, who longs for three things in her life:

Health (because without it you truly have nothing) Happiness (because without it everything you do have is meaningless) and Love (because life just isn't worth living without it) Everything else you get in this life is just gravy. What you don't get... merely a case of circumstance. I will never know what it feels like to be of wealth privilege in my lifetime and I thank God for that small blessing. When you are everything loses its sense of taste or zest for life. Sure you can have more but how much more have you really attained? Anything of substance or worth cannot be measured in dollars. I truly believe that.

My life has been a difficult one. I don't deny that in any fashion, but I am thankful for all the mistakes I have made, as it has led me here. It is painful sometimes... most times to look back and see where I've come from but I am no longer interested in where I've been but rather where I'm going that keeps my spirit, interest and quest in tact.

Thursday, August 5, 2010

Me, My Yolk & I

As of late, I have been fighting with my inner self in search of true peace and tranquility in my life. More and more I spend my time contemplating what true inner happiness really is. How can I achieve it? What will it mean for me? I have come to a point in my life, a cross road if you will, where I feel that it is time to change my ways…my path. So I have begun meditating a lot more than I used to; in search of the answers… my answers.

There is so much I want for my life. Dreams, aspirations and basic needs that I need and cannot deny myself any longer. My life feels like it’s in constant turmoil-trying too hard to do battle with lost causes. I keep giving fuel to things I shouldn't while neglecting areas of my life that have been screaming for attention for years. It cries for quiet and calm. My heart, craving the happiness and laughter it once knew, instead of the heavy weight of sorrow and sadness that has made a permanent home within my heart.

So how does one change their life? I believe it must begin with how we view life in general. The way in which we view life is at the root of how we deal with all of it. But then it would also be true to say that circumstances play a major role in how one deals with life and how their perception of it changes shortly thereafter. I suppose that real strength is to somehow understand that although everything can be taken away from a person, one attitude must always remain in order to survive. That is to choose one’s own path one’s own attitude in any given set of circumstances. To never forget whom you are inside. Realize that now; in this moment of time, you are creating. You are creating your next moment based on what you are feeling and thinking. That is what's real.

So is it a matter of just letting go of the unconscious belief that being anxious about the past or the future will somehow protect us and instead reprogram our cells with new ways of responding? Most of us find that eliminating anxiety and lifting depression to create security in one’s own life is a difficult, if not impossible task to achieve. So that it is much easier to give into the negative feelings that overwhelm our senses then change them into positive ones. “What’s the point in being optimistic? Nothing good ever happens to me” seems to be the constant rerun statement in my brain. You wake up every morning with every intention to change and do the right things that we all know we must or at least “should” do. Yet the day always ends with feelings of disappointment as you lay in bed right before drifting off to sleep. It’s becoming ridiculous.

What I’ve realized is that I am still holding onto my past- so much so that I’m almost afraid to move forward. All the memories of poor judgement and bad choices made still haunt my very existence. I am allowing this negative thought process to overpower and overshadow the new person I am trying to give birth too. For fear that it will just be another loss or failure down the road. That I have already made too many mistakes along the way and now at 36 I cannot afford to make anymore. I know it’s wrong to give into fear and these sort of feelings however, how at times it’s tough to keep them at bay?

In The Words Of A Brilliant Man… ”A person experiences life as something separated from the rest - a kind of optical delusion of consciousness. Our task must be to free ourselves from this self-imposed prison, and through compassion, to find the reality of Oneness.”

Albert Einstein