Another Year

It's a new year,
But everything still looks the same.
When I look around,
Old ghosts still remain.
Promises of tomorrow,
Still covered in yesterday's blood.
Making my eyes well up with so many tears,
They could cause a flood.

Thoughts of us pound through my brian
Each one like a sharp knife jabbing at my skin.
There are so many words I want to say,
But how and where do I begin?
How do I tell you that by staying I'd be living a lie
Yet by living without you a part of me would die.

I feel like a soilder caught between two wars,
One loyal to my mind and the other paying homage to my heart.
Both whispering like a lover in the heat of the night.
My heart promising that things will change if I stay,
But my mind screams louder telling me it's time for a brand new start.

So here I sit facing a new year and a brand new day,
But everything around me still looks the same.
Wanting so badly to end this madness,
Yet still too afraid to walk away.
My mind and heart still doing battle,
And each trying so hard to win the war.
However, I am much too tired to keep score.

I do not know how this will all end,
Will it be my heart that keeps me prisoner to this love?
Or will my mind finally set me free,
Nevertheless, this will be the year that I mend.