Friday, September 27, 2013


The last few days it feels as though, I've been hanging on by a moment. Only those who truly know me can attest to this.

You know, it's funny. Life can really try your spirit, until you truly feel like you have nothing left of yourself to give.  There are moments.. events that occur where you can literally feel the life being sucked out from the inner most part of you.  You are utterly broken; falling into a blackness and no matter how hard you fight, you cannot stop yourself from reaching the bottom.  Then, in a moment of complete darkness there is a calm in a moment silence.   Then, you hear something.  The loudest voice from a place unknown. What it tells you in that moment could be your only salvation IF you choose to listen.

Tonight, that voice told me to search for meaning.  To search for inspiration.  That if I truly looked for it, I’d find an answer easily.  It seemed incredibly preposterous, but I was so defeated within my own mind that even the most impossible of things would have seemed possible to me.

(Another peculiar thing about the human psyche.  It takes a human being to be at their lowest point to truly become humble enough to see/hear God’s favor.  At that point, all you have left is your faith.  My deepest sympathies to those of you who have no faith in anything.  In which case the darkness could be ever-lasting )

I found myself on YouTube and that is where I met, Zach Sobiech.   He was waiting for me, to tell me a story.  His story. 

After my life was introduced to his (for a brief, beautiful moment in time) I began to cry so uncontrollably. It was then that I heard the voice (from within) again. It said:

"An illness can only consume your body and sadly you may not be able to have any control over that but, what you do have control over is not allowing the illness to consume your spirit. It and your heart are yours eternally.”

Something I've always known but never really wanted to understand until tonight; after meeting this man.

I truly believe with all my heart that somehow he was sent to me, in my moment of darkness, to give me some peace and show me some light.  Not just any light, but my light.  I’m not saying that everything will be easier now, but it’s given me some true divine insight. 

Z A C H  S O B I E C H

I knew absolutely nothing about you (or your life story) before this night.  But, thank you for finding me somehow just the same.  Now, I will never forget you and whenever the darkness of my illness comes to visit (as it always does) you will now be the light that shines through – bringing promise and life to my silence.

May God always bless and keep you (his Angel) in his light.  May your family, friends and all of us who have come to be touched by your life always feel your warmth… however “UP UP UP in the clouds” you are

 I think it’s time all of you met him too …

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