The last few days it feels as though, I've been hanging on by a moment. Only those who truly know me can attest to this.
You
know, it's funny. Life can really try your spirit, until you truly feel like you
have nothing left of yourself to give. There are moments.. events that occur
where you can literally feel the life being sucked out from the inner most part
of you. You are utterly broken; falling into a blackness and no matter how hard
you fight, you cannot stop yourself from reaching the bottom. Then, in a moment
of complete darkness there is a calm in a moment silence. Then, you hear
something. The loudest voice from a place unknown. What it tells you in that
moment could be your only salvation IF you choose to listen.
Tonight,
that voice told me to search for meaning. To search for inspiration. That if I
truly looked for it, I’d find an answer easily. It seemed incredibly
preposterous, but I was so defeated within my own mind that even the most
impossible of things would have seemed possible to me.
(Another
peculiar thing about the human psyche. It takes a human being to be at their
lowest point to truly become humble enough to see/hear God’s favor. At that
point, all you have left is your faith. My deepest sympathies to those of you
who have no faith in anything. In which case the darkness could be ever-lasting
)
I
found myself on YouTube and that is where I met, Zach Sobiech. He was waiting
for me, to tell me a story. His story.
After
my life was introduced to his (for a brief, beautiful moment in time) I began to
cry so uncontrollably. It was then that I heard the voice (from within) again.
It said:
"An
illness can only consume your body and sadly you may not be able to have any
control over that but, what you do have control over is not allowing the illness
to consume your spirit. It and your heart are yours
eternally.”
Something
I've always known but never really wanted to understand until tonight; after
meeting this man.
I truly believe with all my heart that somehow he was sent to me, in my moment of darkness, to give me some peace and show me some light. Not just any light, but my light. I’m not saying that everything will be easier now, but it’s given me some true divine insight.
I truly believe with all my heart that somehow he was sent to me, in my moment of darkness, to give me some peace and show me some light. Not just any light, but my light. I’m not saying that everything will be easier now, but it’s given me some true divine insight.
Z
A C H S O B I E C H
I
knew absolutely nothing about you (or your life story) before this night. But,
thank you for finding me somehow just the same. Now, I will never forget you
and whenever the darkness of my illness comes to visit (as it always does) you
will now be the light that shines through – bringing promise and life to my
silence.
May
God always bless and keep you (his Angel) in his light. May your family,
friends and all of us who have come to be touched by your life always feel your
warmth… however “UP UP UP in the clouds” you are
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