For the past few days I have been thinking a lot about an Uncle of mine that past away, almost a year ago. As the anniversary of his death approaches the more I realize how much I truly do miss him. It's amazing how some people believe that time heals everything and yet I don't see how that is possible. My feelings of sadness are the same today as they were a year ago.
In any event, I wanted to share a letter I wrote to him the day he died. It is with him now...forever.
Dear Zio Mario
It's truly incredible how many memories your mind recalls when you just take a moment to STOP and think about what a person has meant to you within this lifetime. What saddens my heart more than anything is that as human beings we never truly take the time to "STOP and smell the roses" until we are forced to.I was so very sorry to hear about your passing Dear Uncle. More than anything it hurts me to know that you were all alone during the final moments of your death. It is that very thought that I have not been able to shake since I heard the news. Although, I am most certain that you were comforted by God's light and accompanied home by his angels, I cannot help but feel that somehow we should have known. Sensed it in some way and been there for you. It makes me sad to know that I was robbed of the chance to say goodbye. And yet why should I have been granted a goodbye when you lived so close to me for all these years and I barely made time to drop in from time to time and say "hello". Although, I have known you all my life, I feel as though we barely knew much about one another at all. There was so much I could have said and never did and for that I am truly sorry. Isn’t that the rub? We always want to resolves things when it’s too late, but never take the time or make the effort to do so when the moment is in front of us. Instead we spend our lives continuously doing wrong by people. When all we should really be doing is loving and caring for one another – especially those who love and care about us so much. As we always seem to hurt those people the most. Why is that I wonder?
I didn’t want you leaving this world believing that you didn’t matter, because you did. So much! I learned a lot from you, especially during the final day of your life on this earth. You taught me that the time to live is NOW. We only have one life, so do it up in style everyday. To smile and be thankful for all those people in our lives who truly love us and have our back in times of need. To be a good person with a good heart, and to never ever sweat the small stuff. We all have our crosses to bare in this life, but if you believe it was all meant for a common purpose then everything will work out fine.
I know your life was a tough one, on good days a struggle at best, but you lived it and that truly means something. After all is said and done it is not how many times we fall in this life time that is important, but how well we rise after every fall that truly matters. A man’s only measure is how loving, kind and sweet he can be to those around him when times in his life are horrible. I guess we all forget!
To say my life has been easy....No…. but it has been very fruitful just the same. I know that there are times that my pain is great and times where my happiness overshadows all evil. I will always try to give the best of myself to everyone, because I know that they deserve nothing less and by giving them less than my best would only mean that I am cheating us both. The hard roads are many, and the tears plentiful but I know that no matter how difficult the journey, how poor in riches I am, I know one thing......that I am HAPPY right here, right now.....for being allowed the chance....to laugh, to cry, to love, to learn and most importantly to NEVER regret who I am..... Everyday of my life. Today for many reasons I am sad, but I pray that tomorrow will bring new promise.
So, I wanted to thank you for being my Uncle within this life. I loved you with all my heart and will continue to forever. Because there is a forever…I know there is. Someone told me today that “there is no such thing as forever” but I don’t believe that one bit. Love…love is forever. The kindness you show others…that can NEVER be taken away. The words and legacy one leaves behind will always live on…forever!
Sleep well…in peace….
Sleep well…in peace….
Died May 2, 2009, Age 75