Bring Me Back To Life

I always find it incredible how easily music can jolt one's memory.  It can literally change your state and affect our behaviour without even being consciously aware of it. Now that's what I call powerful influence at its best!

I found myself going through my music collection over the weekend, and I began to play some "nameless CDs" in order to figure out what was on them. One CD led to two and so on. Before I knew it, I was digging into my "older stuff". Music I haven't listened to in years. With each song I played it instantly brought me back to a certain time and place. It's as though the tune manipulated my brain and took my entire being to a place I hadn't known/visited in quite some time.

Immediately, my emotions got involved and all the memories came flooding back like a tidal wave. It was fascinating how quickly my mind brought back every last detail, event and sensation; related to whatever it was I was playing at that moment. Not to mention people that I had shared my life with during those times.

Music allows each of us the opportunity to live our history as an experience. It does this by restoring lost moments we once treasured, bringing them back to life in an instant. As a woman (and I'm sure most of you can relate) I have always associated music with men. C'mon ladies, you know this is true. Who can pick up a Bon Jovi album and not think of at least one guy and at least one moment you spent with him? I'm sure you can!

Well, I cannot speak for everyone but for me, music is the route of all things wonderful. A hidden "sixth sense" . Most believe we have only five, but I know better. It's almost like smelling a certain scent. Do you know what I mean? When you smell something it instantly reminds you of someone/something and takes you back to all things familiar to that very fragrance. It's quite common after all,they do say that scent is the one element closely linked to one's memory. I also believe this to be true however; music makes a direct
correlation to memory as well. At least in my books.

It has always amazed me what a certain song will allow your mind to remember. It has the power to make you come alive again, cry again and even (dare I say) fall in love again, with someone/something in
the past. I can think of a million different songs this very second,that will forever link me to a certain moment or individual. Mainly how my heart belonged, in love with certain people. Here is but to name a few:

 Everybody Wang Chung Tonight (Wang Chung) - Acapulco Trip in 1987

 By The Dash Board Light ( Meatloaf) - Vince Galloro / The Gang on Dyrimple, at Jane/Bloor Street, in Toronto.

Jessie's Girl ( Rick Springfield) - Nancy Galloro and her "school chums" - Carm and Connie

Dress You Up ( Madonna) - Nancy Galloro.  She took me to my very first Madonna concert ( and every one thereafter), where I met my idol - Madonna.  I have looked/admired and cherished this woman's music ever since that day.

Look out Weekend (Debbie Dance mix) - Lucy Iozzo and all the Italian club dances we attended

Baby Love ( Regina - Dancemix) - The very first guy I ever fell in love with - John Ruffalo

One Way Love (TKA - Dancemix) - The end of my first relationship with John Ruffalo

Start Me Up ( The Rolling Stones) - Mike and Joe Veroni

Hysteria ( Def Leppard) - Joanne and I writing this band's name, across our school wall on summer break, while taking a break from playing tennis at Gracedale park.

Heaven's On Fire (Kiss) - Robbie, Doni and Paulie Giardulli.  My favourite brothers, next to my own!

I Think I Love You From Head To Toe ( Lisa Lisa ) - The Sila Banquet Hall, where the DJ playing there kept playing this song once every hour to try and get me to go out with him.

Cruel Summer (Bananarama) - Watching The Karate Kid Movie (for the first time) with Tony Scarlato and my brothers.

Never say Goodbye ( Bon Jovi ) - Humber Summit School Dance with my boyfriend Jimmy Arniotis. A true gentleman and sweetheart, who always made me smile.  *I'm sorry I broke your heart*

Spring Love ( Stevie B ) - One of the greatest "80's summers", when I met/feel in love with Carlo Caruso

They're Playin' Our Song ( Trinere) - Hanging out at Beckers / "The Park at Weston/Wilson Ave" with the gang ( Maria, Fredrick, Tony,Carlo, Domenic, Paul and I )

Diamond Girl - The very first "night-club" I ever got into with -Maria Nero and Jeanne Palumbo. I danced with Rubin " the Latino Cubin" all night long!

Party Your Body ( Stevie B) The 9th Grade Emery School Dance.  I was dancing with Maria, where I then got on top of Frank's shoulders and saw the cutest boy I had ever seen, across a crowded dancefloor.  His name was Nael "Nick" Ayoub.  It was love at first sight :) * I miss/love you so much*

Season's Change ( Expose) - Emery's Christmas Dance at Rio Banquet Hall.  My first Christmas with Nael. We attended with his brother Mike and his best friend (at the time) Harrin. He bought me a white monkey stuffed animal with a scarf tied around it's neck, made up of our school colours.  He must have poured an entire bottle of "Azzaro" cologne on it.  He said that he wanted me to think of him everytime I held it, so he made it smell like him.  :)  It still does...

The Joshua Tree CD ( U2 ) Jimmy Arniotis, Freddrick, Frank Noble, Nick/Melanie Rossi

In A Dream ( Rockell ) Ida and Josie Dolce.  I can still see Josie dancing in her driveway, on Honeywood!
 
The Afterglow CD ( Sarah McLachlan ) - Melisa Cannella
 
Take Me In Your Arms / Promise Me ( Little Suzy) - Daniela Paletta.  Driving all over town in her new red Jetta, with the beats up high and the windows down low.
 
Let The Music Play (Shannon), Rhythm Is A Dancer ( Snap), Anything From The Young Backstreet Boys or Madonna - Gina Droutsas.  There truly are too many songs that bring back memories with this girl!!!!
 
Two Steps Behind (Def Leppard) Frank Di Stasi ( every damn song from this band has been tainted) lol
 
Mama, I'm Comin' Home / No More Tears ( Ozzy Ozbourne) - Johnny Giardulli
 
The How To Stop An Atomic Bomb CD ( U2) - Johnny Giardulli
 
The Emancipation of Mimi CD ( Mariah Carey) Making out with Milan Rodriguez in the parking lot of Arizona's Bar, at 2 am, on cold and rainy Friday night, after dancing the night away in the bar with Eva, Daniela, Gina, Julie and Melisa.
 
The 8701 CD (Usher) - Eva Gabinet
 
Daddy's Home ( Usher) Greg Marsbergen
 
There are many, many more ( as you can imagine)  My apologies for the long winded list.  Once I got going I just couldn't stop.  Now you know just how addictive music is in this Writer's life!

Return to Innocence




Lay your head down and rest
Close those big beautiful eyes one last time
And drum up one last lullaby
For today you become Heaven's guest.

You had the voice of a songbird, both soothing and free
One this world won't soon forget.
The way you wrote words to music was unique
And you sang them beautifully

How could we have been so blind
How dare we not see
That your words were like daggers through your heart
And not just simply a rhythm to a rhyme

For an artist's heart can feel pain so deep
Like a painter who hangs his portrait revealing a million thoughts
Never needs to say a thing
And a writer will write words they sometimes cannot speak

You once said that love is a losing game
A game that should never be played
For some of us are too weak
And will die from it in the last frame

I too have played the game
With opponents who've won with ease
But if we never take a chance and love, dear lady
Life would surely be a dying shame

May you hear the words I speak to you this day
Like a whisper in the wind from heaven high
Your life had meaning, your beauty had depth
And you spoke the words some of us can never say

You were loved so deep and so true
And I consider myself blessed in every way
That your words and music I found
And opened up a part of me, made possible by you


In your life your words brought meaning
Hitting home with every lyric you ever sang
Now, in death (that came too soon) they'll always be remembered
Left echoing in my mind, as forever thoughts of you lay dreaming


In loving memory of my dearest Amy Winehouse….R.I.P.
May your soul finally feel the freedom it's always wanted, as you return to innocence.
I hope you spend eternity flying high, my song bird.
You will always be missed...

I'M NOT AFRAID!

Music and words have always been the truest loves of my life.  I don't think I have ever felt so powerful about any one thing ever before.  The only marriage I feel at times I can ever remain faithful to.  The passion I feel for them is indescribable, yet something I always attempt to do.  Truly powerful, no matter the message. 

Throughout my life I have reflected upon many different song writers and felt every word that ever fell out of their pen.  Some become the "loves of the day" others "loves of the month" yet there are only a very special few that remain forever in my life.  The truest one I pay respects to today is none other than: " Eminem"

I have always shared a special bond with this man.  I was a "greatest fan" since the beginning and others had a very slim chance of ever swaying my heart from him.  Through his words we  always connected on such a profound level.  He, a simple guy trying to attain a dream.  Building on a road paved by bricks of his painful life.  I, a simple girl pained and truly touched by ever word; because in my own way (on another level) I was going through the same. 

Throughout, I have always been given a weird look when telling others that this man has been my silent mentor for a good part of my adult life.  As if he was anything but one would call a role model.  Yet, I whole heartedly disagree.  You see, we're all different and one person's peace is another's destruction.  We must all find inner meaning to our lives on any level possible.  Eminem is mine.

Why should society dictate who the "good people" are in this world.  More importantly, why should a man such as this (One whose demons have caused such havoc and turmoil in his life, and regardless of that fact rises from the ashes every time), not be seen as one?  My heart would sooner speak to him.  Yet, he is continuously shunned for the way he chooses to express himself.  Claiming his pain vulgar and offensive to his fans.  Influencing our youth in a negative manner and not fit to be a leader in any way.

Yet is pain not vulgar?  Should we not celebrate the idea that this man looked at his life and tried?  That he did not just throw his hands in the air in failure and say " I'm simply going to be another statistic and simply become a product of the horrible environment I was raised to believe in"  We all know where we've been.  Both the good and the bad places.  Yet to me, what takes true courage and strength are those who refuse to live in that realm of thought.  The empty abyss where depression is king and self-loathing it's concubine.
It shouldn't matter where you've been, but rather where you're going that should have any relevance-no?
I would sooner follow a person like that, than any other.  For these are the true hero's in life.
The world is a cruel judge of character and seldom forgiving of any of us.  However we cannot and should not let that deter us from being who we are at all times.

To the man called " EMINEM "
From the truest centre of me, I thank you for always having the courage to simply be you.  You have and will always continue to cleanse me from my own demons.  Allowing me the strength and courage to stand up and fight my battle of becoming my own individual each day.  Your words are truly epic and have found a way to awaken energies in me that I never felt existed.  Proving that not all addictions are bad.  Let it be known that there are many in this world-ones that others would never realize exist.  It's unreal to me how we all live ( or at least try to) the same way and we are oblivious to one another's pain.  I, as you, feel like a comedian hiding behind a crying clown most days of my life.  It's a role we must play however- to help and comfort others in our lives. In some way it keeps us sane, because we know the reality and the fact that giving into it can kill us slowly a bit every day; if we let it.

When you look back on your life consider all the falls a blessing and all the pain a tool (as you have been doing all along) As you and I both know (so painfully well) that without continual storms there could never be the possibility of  beautiful rainbows.

I know you will never read this, but thank you.  You are my most passionate mentor and one of my truest hero's.

JUST A FOOL

I wrote this song a long time ago. It was never finished until now. Ironic how some things never leave our memories. I am planning on collaborating with a few brilliant minds to make this song come alive with music. We shall see what transpires.  Until then, I hope you all enjoy the effort.



Verse 1

You said you’d never leave me
Or break my heart again.
You said that you’d stay by my side,
Until the very end
But now I look around and you’re already gone,
I can’t help but sit here and wonderin’ what went wrong.


Verse 2

How could my heart have tricked me?
Deceived me about our love
You promised to be my everything
The one my soul dreamed of
How could this be happening?
How could you just walk away?
My heart and mind keep struggling between what is real and illusion since that day


Chorus

Am I just a fool – Love’s Fool
To have ever thought I meant more to you, than what I did
Am I just a fool – Love’s Fool
Or was it just your manly charm that made my heart settle for the lowest bid


Verse 3

Now I sit here all alone
Counting all my wasted tears
They leave no echo of where they fall
Looking around at what I once believed was ours
Now has no image of you in it at all


Verse 1

You said you’d never leave me
Or break my heart again.
You said that you’d stay by my side
Until the very end
But now I look around and you’re already gone
I can’t help but sit here and wonderin’ what went wrong


Chorus

Am I just a fool – Love’s Fool
To have ever thought I meant more to you, than what I did?
Am I just a fool – Love’s Fool
Or was it just your manly charm that made my heart settle for the lowest bid.

Remembering Michael..

It's almost been a year since his death.

This is my tribute to the most incredible man of our time. The Legend, The Icon, The Individual, The Man.... MICHAEL JACKSON!

Sadly on June 25,2009 the world lost an incredible human being. His vibe, music and loving nature will never be duplicated within our life time again. Many attempt to, but there will truly NEVER be another you Michael. Now you are free from all the prejudices in this world. I am truly sorry that some failed to see your purity, but I believe that those trials truly showed the world exactly what you were made of: Strength, style, grace, love and individualism. I adored all that you were and am honored to have shared this world with you. You have touched me in more ways than you shall ever know. I intend to treasure your legacy by being a caring, loving and giving human being just like you. You are the reason I fell in love with music and writing and the need to help others. You have always inspired my creativity in these areas, therefore today I thank you from the bottom of my heart for all that you were to me. You truly were and will always remain: My mentor, My hero, My friend. R.I.P. Dearest Michael..

As I write this, something occured to me. Could there in fact be individuals out there who don't know who this magnificent man was? My inner voice screams: "IMPOSSIBLE" Yet, this may actually be so. Therefore, if you are reading this and fall into this category of man/woman than enjoy the little "synopsis of Michael Jackson" below. Compliments of Wikipiedia. Michael Joseph Jackson was born on August 28, 1958, in Gary Indiana, USA. He was the seventh child of the Jackson Family.

He made his debut onto the professional music scene at the age of 11 as a member of The Jackson 5 in 1969, and later began a solo career in 1971 while still a member of the group. Referred to as the "King of Pop"[2] in subsequent years, his 1982 album Thriller remains the world's best-selling record of all time[3] and four of his other solo studio albums are among the world's best-selling records: Off the Wall (1979), Bad (1987), Dangerous (1991) and History (1995).

With stage performances and music videos, Jackson popularized a number of physically complicated dance techniques, such as the robot and the moonwalk. His distinctive musical sound and vocal style influenced many hip hop, pop and contemporary R&B artists.

Jackson donated and raised millions of dollars for beneficial causes through his foundations, charity singles, and support of 39 charities.

One of the few artists to have been inducted into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame twice, his other achievements include multiple Guinness World Records—including one for "Most Successful Entertainer of All Time"—13 Grammy Awards, 13 number one singles in his solo career, and the sale of 750 million records worldwide.[4] Jackson's highly publicized personal life, coupled with his successful career, made him a part of popular culture for almost four decades. Michael Jackson died on June 25, 2009, aged 50.[5] The specific cause of death has yet to be determined.[2] Before his death, Jackson had announced a 50-date sell-out This Is It comeback tour, in London, UK.

Let us always celebrate the magnificent: Singer, songwriter, record producer, arranger, dancer, choreographer, actor, author, businessman, financier, philanthropist that was: THE ONE...THE ONLY... MICHAEL JACKSON