Monday, November 15, 2010

With This Ring...

My best friend and I decided to browse engagement rings over the weekend.

She has met the man of her dreams and they have decided to walk the journey of life together.

I can honestly say that I have never done such a thing before in my life: “Ring Shop”
I always assumed this little ritual was something that men do with other men, and that women had very little to do with it.  However, much to my surprise, there was an equal ratio of women to men in the store.
Naturally, I am well aware of the fact that some women do pick out their own rings (for whatever reason) however, I still find this to be quite taboo.

I had often wondered what kind of feelings or emotions men go through when doing something like this.
I suppose this is why I found myself incredibly drawn to a particular guy in the store that day.

I watched him as he looked at (what seemed to be) endless glass cases in the store- all easily displaying approximately 50 – 100 rings per case. I was completely overwhelmed, so I can almost imagine what he must have been thinking. Yet, somehow he was calm. He looked at each ring intently, trying to find the perfect ring for his incredible lady. She must be, because with each ring the salesman suggested his reply was simply: “No, no, she is much too special to me and the ring must be equally so”. I believe my heart melted at that very moment. Then, he found it! The most precious stone, in the most perfect setting, for the most incredible woman who owns his heart. I swear he looked overjoyed. Like a kid at Christmas. I found myself smiling from ear to ear and was truly happy for him. I couldn’t take my eyes off him. I have witnessed romantic gestures before, but never one where the other individual it was meant for was absent. I’m really happy I got a chance to see something like that. It gave me hope for romance in my own life.

In the same breath a thought came over me, and wondered if most men feel that way when looking for an engagement ring. Are they all as excited as the man in my store was? Somehow, I doubt it. I can appreciate that it is a very involved and un-nerving process for most. That somewhere in the midst of it all the romantic appeal has been lost for many men.

Gentleman, I can not speak for all women, but allow this one to have your ear for just a moment. When taking that step in your relationship remember one thing. She loves you, no matter what. So try not to get lost in the hype of cut, clarity and size. It’s a symbol of your love – yes, but keep in mind that it shouldn’t ever be a dollar symbol. Make it a romantic and beautiful experience for you both.

Secondly, I realize that this is one of the biggest decisions that any man will make in his life, but please just relax. Don’t take her with you and ask her to pick out a ring of her choice, and certainly don’t ask her to describe it for you. This is your moment to shine, to show her just how romantic you can be. Do it all on your own and for God sake’s surprise her. If you don’t you are denying yourself a once in a life time opportunity to show her just how thoughtful and romantic you can really be. Again, its “crazy scary” to go this route, but definitely worth the efforts, I assure you! Just imagine the look on her face. It’s truly a moment you will both never forget – not to mention it will make for a great story with family and friends later.

Don’t be consumed with feelings of fear on whether or not she will love it. She will, If for no other reason than because he cared enough to make it a special and loving moment just for the two of you.

To the man in the store:  Thank you for making me remember that romance still does exist.  Congratulations!

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