An Angel's Goodbye

In loving memory of a great man. Antonio Dodaro. 

       

This is a poem I wrote, especially for my Uncle, Antonio Dodaro.
He left this life rather suddenly and will be sadly missed.

Isn't it funny how you remember things ( in great detail) when someone dies?  It's uncanny.

My mind has been tapping into memories that I truly haven't thought of, since I was a little girl.

He was a great man, who for as long as I can remember, could make me smile in an instant.  Could make me laugh even faster.  He was a story teller, a singer, a family man.  Someone who still believed that kindness was something worth showing all those you loved each day.

I will never forget him.

I wrote the first thing that came to me and have included it below:

An Angel's Goodbye

An angel came to me  last night
He knelt down by my bedside and said
My time has come, I have to leave
I will not be here in the morning, but rather
by God's side instead

I know my passing came rather quickly
and there was not much time for goodbyes
It will come as a shock to you and I know you'll be sad
But there really is not need to cry

You see when God came for me I was happy to go
Because my destiny has been fulfilled
My life has always been full and I've savoured much
And I spent a great deal of time loving you so

So please do not allow the end of my journey to leave you with a void
Instead I want you to fill it with memories of who I was
Remembering all the ways I brought you joy

Always know that I loved you so
And never think that you didn't do, say or show me yours  enough
You have been the light of my life and reason for my journey
But the time has come and I must go

I promise you that I will always be with you
Sharing the sunshine of tomorrow
Only this time I will be above the sun and you will be below it
And each time it warms your face you will remember me anew.

R.I.P Dearest Uncle.
I cannot wait to someday ride a rainbow with you...

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                            

Another Year

It's a new year,
But everything still looks the same.
When I look around,
Old ghosts still remain.
Promises of tomorrow,
Still covered in yesterday's blood.
Making my eyes well up with so many tears,
They could cause a flood.

Thoughts of us pound through my brian
Each one like a sharp knife jabbing at my skin.
There are so many words I want to say,
But how and where do I begin?
How do I tell you that by staying I'd be living a lie
Yet by living without you a part of me would die.

I feel like a soilder caught between two wars,
One loyal to my mind and the other paying homage to my heart.
Both whispering like a lover in the heat of the night.
My heart promising that things will change if I stay,
But my mind screams louder telling me it's time for a brand new start.

So here I sit facing a new year and a brand new day,
But everything around me still looks the same.
Wanting so badly to end this madness,
Yet still too afraid to walk away.
My mind and heart still doing battle,
And each trying so hard to win the war.
However, I am much too tired to keep score.

I do not know how this will all end,
Will it be my heart that keeps me prisoner to this love?
Or will my mind finally set me free,
Nevertheless, this will be the year that I mend.

FOR A WRITER'S HEART

With the author's permission, I am sharing a poem that was beautifully written to me.  I am so deeply moved that one of my "followers/fan" took the time to write this to me.  I truly appreciate all that it took to send it and admire your strength.  It left me completely captivated and in "awe" of it's contents. 

As a Writer, I truly appreciate the beauty of words and what it means to have the courage to share them.  I am touched and humbled by the gesture.  It means a great deal to me that I can be a muse for others to create upon.


I woke up this morning with thoughts of you
As last night I dreamt of all the joy we shared together


I would swallow the ocean to get to you……. my love
And sell the salt to buy you pearls from a gypsy near the sea


I thought of you last evening
As I walked by the lake of serenity
Then I blew a soft kiss into the warm wind for you


Hoping you would be sitting there
waiting for it to touch your lips


I walked by the lake with you in my thoughts
I then picked up a stone that I skipped across the water


Wishing that it would make it across the river to you
And watch it change into a beautiful butterfly ....landing on your white hat


I thought about you last day in the middle of the storm
And afterwards the rainbow formed a colorful painted sky


I imagined the sky to be our canvas the clouds our paint
And wind as the invisible brush
I made a bridge joining the clouds to see you


And I asked the angels to help me build it for you to make it strong
As I want to reach you with all of my passion


When I get there my dear I will run to you….I will see only you
As I pass through the morning light…the eyes of the sun
And hold you up and lift you into my world

 yvan

Love In Vain

With each passing love
my heart explodes
With each touch
my soul implodes
With each lie
my will is broken
With each person I trust
there are always words left unspoken
How does one continue to believe
How I ask
When the only thing your words do is deceive

Is This How Love SHOULD Feel?

Sometimes I think, so I might not forget
All the things I felt the day we first met
There are times when it doesn’t even seem real
The days filled with sunlight, the nights filled with romance and all this happiness that I feel
I want to be careful and protect the heart that is mine
But each time I try to pull away from you
The butterflies within my tummy rehearse a dance so divine
Will he prove to be worthy?

Is a question my heart asks my mind
Only you can answer that dear heart, but please understand it will take time
So sometimes I think, so I might not miss the exact moment that my heart is convinced
That the story of you and I is spectacular wonder and incredible bliss

And that the only thing we are to one another…..is everything!

A Dedication To All Lost Loves

In a dream I loved you, but it was in a heartbeat that you were gone.
Never, has there been a man who's ever loved me more
Or one who has ever done me so wrong.

In a dream you promised me the world
And my heart would always have a home
But all you've done is destroyed my faith in us
Because you went and left me all alone.

You said our love would always stand the test of time
And weather any storm with ease
But now that very love is dying
Battling life's disease.

I wanted to believe that all you said was true
More than you will ever know.
I never thought I'd ever hear you utter those words to me
That our time has ended and that you had to go.

I will never question my faith or love for you
Because I know what I felt was real
I will never regret allowing you a place within my heart
Even though I fear the hurt will never heal

I see you now walking in the streets
And all I want to do is make you turn around and look at me
To ask you what I've got to do to make my life mean more to you
Instead I watch you pass by as I hide in pain
Making sure I remember every last detail about you
In case I never see you again.

In a dream I loved you, but it was in a heartbeat that you were gone.

Never, has there been a man who's ever loved me more

Or one who has ever done me so wrong.

Once..I Stood Alone

What I sought was one strong man,
To test the boundaries of this world
Someone who would stand here with me
All the way to heaven

To laugh and live and smile with each day
The man I sought would help me breath
And keep me up when I am weak
Helping me find whatever it is I seek

To make my world colourful
Taking my heart and mind to places of unconscious bonds
I've never seen nor heard
His touch, his eyes speaking volumes of his affection
Without truly saying a word

Telling me in only ways he can
That he will re write my love song
And catch my every tear
That in his embrace I have nothing to fear
What I wish to say to him is simple and clear
Take a chance and you will see
That what you seek begins with me

So take my hand and we shall walk
To see all life's treasures and adventures too
So let's walk together, side by side
And experience together this enchanted ride
You with me, and me with you
We will never dream for something new.

SPIRITS OF VIRGINIA TECH

For some reason I had thoughts about The Virginia Tech High school this morning. At first I could not exactly place my feelings or why it was on my mind this morning as I was getting ready for work. Thoughts of the massacre that occurred within their walls only a few years ago. Since the feelings continued to consume me for the remainder of the morning, I began to question when the event actually occurred. So I looked it up and there it was in black and white. April 17, 2007. Today is May 17th.

The anniversary was only a month ago. At that moment, it became clear why the thoughts of that day were swirling around in my head. That and thoughts that someday, my little nephew would begin school. The days of "feeling safe in your school" are long gone and it will only get worse as the decades move on. I become quite anxious thinking about the day he begins junior high and then high school. What will the world be like then? What will the school systems be like then? Suddenly, two words come to mind: "HOME SCHOOLING"

I never want to know that what happened at Virginia Tech, will ever happen again. Yet, it has...and it does, all over the world. I cannot even imagine what those people went through - and I never care to find out either.

I wrote a short poem, in honor of their memory on that day...

A place of laughter
A time of smiles
Has now been silenced and replaced with long lines of single files
We stand in mourning to say goodbye by candlelight
To all the ones we will forever adore and now miss, with all our might

I know they say that in time tears do dry, hearts will mend and even hurt will pass
Yet right now it feels like this can never be so
For how can the pain ever subside? How will we ever let go
Will we ever escape the sadness and terror of this day
The memory and pain etched in our heats that seems will forever stay

Let us pray in silence for the ones forever gone
And hope that in the midst of the last moments they spend in horror
That God made their journey to Heaven upon
The wings of his Angels steady and fast
So that their laughter and smiles this time will always last

" In Memory of Lives Lost and Hearts in Pain from the Virginia Tech Massacre"

Monday, April, 16, 2007

Thief Of Hearts

Games played by thieves of hearts

They blind you with their words

Gaining entrance to your soul

Toying with situations that will tear your world apart
This is their job

Their sole mission in life

Manipulating every thought in such a perfect way

So it's effects can slice through your heart like a knife

Working their sorcery that we see as goodness

Blinded by all that is bewitching

Never being quite aware of their motives

In the blink of an eye all is unveiled

Revealing their true colours

To what was once a world of beautiful madness

Has now become a hollow sadness

To what do I owe this auspicious occasion

How could I have been so blind

To have allowed my heart to open in such a treasonous manner

Fooled by a thief who had no intention of forever

And no possible conception of what love is

But that is the intention of the thief of hearts

Who plays their game with no conscience

Looking for a willing soul, who still believes in a fairy tale

Making a mockery of what is real and pure

Bringing an ailment that will wither and rot the truest heart

Embedding within it a disease, that time must try and cure.

Love In Vain

I wonder what it is you see when you look into my eyes.
Do you believe that it is fate that brought you here
Or is the reason for your presence masked in disguise

Do you believe me when I tell you that everything is fine
When I turn away from you, claiming that the tears you see are caused by the wind and not your words
Tell me, am I being unkind

Is it fair that I feel as though you can live without me
Easily and freely without care or pain
That our love story is merely a hoax
A play acted out by two people too afraid to speak the truth
Fearful of uttering aloud that maybe we just weren't meant to be

At times I am filled with such emptiness and all I wish for is happiness
I have so much love for you, but something holds my heart back
Because of all those times of showing you without reaction has left me anxious

I really wanted you to be the one to re-write my love song
One that doesn't end in heartache and tears
The truth is I do believe you are him, but it's taking too long for you to walk the line
But still my soul screams for me to wait and keep strong

I wish I knew what to do To make my life mean more to you
For I can only be who I am, and that is me
All you are is all I ever wanted
So why is this so hard for you to see